Feeds:
Posts
Comments

If you expect me to get on here and bash one of my new favorite musical obsessions, go away because I’m not going to do it.

Far from it in fact. I’ve read the comments out there and I know that a lot of fans – at least the ones that are speaking up – don’t like/hate the new Muse single “Neutron Star Collision (Love is Forever)” but I cannot disagree more. This song is effing awesome and shame on you Muse fans that can’t hear that.

This song isΒ  exaggerated, cheesy, bombastic and extreme to the point of almost being stalkerishly scary – the line “If we die, we die together” comes to mind here – and it is everything that I love about Muse and their music. Unabashedly over the top and, frankly, insane with a good riff and some pretty piano thrown in, a galloping hard beat and wild vocals. Does Muse have a song that characterizes them more than this one?

Nevermind that it is the first single on the new Twilight movie. While I’m a fan of that series, that’s not a reason to love or hate this song. Matt Bellamy revealed on the radio when the song debuted on Monday that he wrote this after his breakup with his girlfriend of many years last fall. If you listen to it in this context, the song is heartbreaking and the cheese factor, which Bellamy openly admits to, is completely justified. If you can’t be honest in a song, when can you be?

I don’t understand why fans are so quick to hate this one. Give it a few more listens, it’s an awesome song and very fitting with the latest album in tone, style, and composition. I may be new to this band, but I’m an up and up fan who knows every song by heart at this point. “Neutron Star Collision” has skyrocketed to be one of my favorites of the bunch.

Some thoughts for this nice, yet chilly Sunday evening:

  • At the beginning of the week, my apartment was unbearably hot. Right now it is an igloo. You have to love spring in New England. Definitely not complaining though I do think it might be time to put socks on.
  • Spent most of the day cleaning out my office/utility area of my apartment. Got sidetracked at 4 and now it’s after 6 and I’m panicking.
  • Crazy busy at work last week, will be again this week. It’s good to keep my mind occupied but it’s making these days, which I don’t really want to go much faster, fly by.
  • LOST IS ALMOST OVER!!!!😦 Two weeks from tonight.
  • Seeing Iron Man 2 tomorrow. V. excited.
  • Going away party for my boss is on Wednesday. Nice send off for him as he’s going to NY two weeks before me. Am dreading what they’ll plan for my send off. I wish they could have just stuck us together.
  • Believe it or not I’m seeing a ballet on Thursday. Ultimate Balanchine. Hope it’s at least entertaining enough.
  • That oil spill is just incredible. So much affected by it that I didn’t even think about. Very sad. I definitely need to read more about it.
  • Tony nominations came out this week and none of them were all that thrilling to me. I haven’t seen anything so I don’t know what got snubbed and what deserves to win. I guess I’m rooting for American Idiot as I’ve been on a real Green Day kick lately and it will be the first show I see when I move.
  • Speaking of Green Day, is there a sadder song from the 90s than “Time of Your Life”? I cry every time I hear it. I then put “Basket Case” on and rock out. Ah, good times. I remember my brother blasting Dookie from his bedroom when it came out and I would always go in and steal the album from him to listen to that song and “When I Come Around.”
  • HBO has starting playing the Sex & The City movie again and I keep watching. I swear I’ve seen that movie 100 times at this point. Definitely a guilty pleasure. Am kinda excited for the new one, however ridiculous it looks.
  • Movies coming I want to see: Prince of Persia (I know), Robin Hood (again, I know), Sex & The City 2, The Twilight Saga: Eclipse and I’m sure there are others coming that I’ve forgotten about.
  • SQUEE! A week from tomorrow, Muse is releasing a brand new song that will be on the Eclipse soundtrack. It’s called “Neutron Star Collision (Love is Forever)” which is an appropriately weird song title for my newest musical obsession. I spent 2 hours Wednesday night watching a Muse concert online when I should have gone to bed. I can’t get enough of them. I now am the proud owner of a 105 song Muse playlist on my iPod (soon to be 106!). It’s pathetic but I don’t care. I mean, how could you not love this over-the-top band?Β  Look at those glasses!

Okay, I desperately need to accomplish more before this night is out. Once again, YouTube has proved to be “the internet explorer to my firefox.”

Seriously guys, why aren’t you all watching The Big Bang Theory?

NEW BLOG!

Hey guys,

I wanted to let you all know that I’m starting a new blog that will focus entirely on my move to New York. It’s called Another Hundred People: My New York Adventure and can be found at anotherhundredpeople.wordpress.com.

The starting post over there explains what the blog’s function will be. I’m still keeping Three Months’ Time but it will probably not be updated too much over the next few weeks as Another Hundred People will be chronicling my upcoming move which has definitely preoccupied all of my time.πŸ™‚

Thanks and I hope you all visit the new site!πŸ™‚

Well it’s May 4th and you all probably know that date holds a lot of meaning to me and my family. It’s been 13 years (!) since my brother died on this date and it just seems incredibly that so much time has passed. When I think about what has happened in my life and in the world since, it seems like he existed in another life, another world. Like it was all just some movie I watched as a kid.

I’m usually really sad on May 4th and the days leading up to it. I go over and over that final week with Steve in my head and listen to my comforting Michael music and just generally detach from everything for a little bit until it all culminates in a big, full-out crying session on May 3rd while listening to the last song he and I ever got to listen to together (“Music of the Night” from Phantom of the Opera in case you’re wondering). And then it passes by about the first week into May and I’m back to normal composure. I think about Stephen every single day, and have done for 13 years, but the pain isn’t as sharp as it normally is on this one day and I go about living my life with him always watching out over me.

So I have to ask myself why this year is different and it is different. Sure, I had my crying session last night and it felt really good. But for the first time, this date has not been figuratively circled on the calendar. For the first time, I haven’t been waiting for this date to come and anticipating the well-worn emotions that go with it. It’s not that I don’t still miss Steve, far from it. And it’s not that the loss hurts any less because it doesn’t. But I feel like I’m in control of it this year. Maybe it’s the pills I’m taking, maybe it’s my impending move to NYC, maybe it’s just growing up, I don’t know.

I’m finding it easier this year to be, I don’t want to say at peace, but not overly sad by today. Does that make sense. It’s on mind, has been all day, surely but when I think of Stephen today or when I look at his picture or listen to a certain song like “The Dance” (that was Stephen’s song with his first girlfriend) or “Empty Chairs at Empty Tables” (he used to sing this at the top of his lungs in the shower. I love him dearly but he was no Michael) or “Memory” which Steve would belt at the top of his lungs every time in an hysterically exaggerated manner, I find myself remembering a lot more of the good times than the not so great final days leading up to whatever happened that morning of the 4th of May, 1997.Β  It aches but it doesn’t overwhelm like it used to. Not all the time anyway.

Grief is a weird thing. My “friends” in high school used to tell me to “just get over it already” because I would become very mopey and depressed on occasion about Stephen. But they were wrong. You don’t get over loss. You might come to terms with it, you might be able to handle it in different, more mature ways as you get older, but you never “get over it.”

For as long as I live, I’ll never forget what this day is, what it means, how it changed my life and my family, how much it hurt when it was fresh and how much it aches as the years go by. I guess I may have to the conclusion, at least this year, that just because I don’t act depressed and sullen for a day doesn’t mean I love him any less or am grieving any less than I always have. And to be honest, being in a good and rather silly mood today makes me feel closer to him than ever because that’s what he was like…

…except when he was annoying the hell out of me, as brothers tend to do.πŸ™‚

Please don’t be saddened or down by this post, it was not meant to be that. That’s not how I feel right now and I hope that you don’t either.Β  To cheer you up (if needed): when Stephen was about 4 years old, around the time I was born, my father got a call at work from our neighbor. She informed him that Stephen was being “neighborly” and filling up her swimming pool. My dad replied that it was very kind of him to do so but he’s so young he shouldn’t be using a hose. The neighbor answered back that he wasn’t. He was filling it up by peeing in it. πŸ™‚ You’re welcome, Steve.

HOLY SHIT, I’M MOVING TO NEW YORK CITY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I’ve known about this for almost a month now but it took until today to actually sink in. Oh My Gawd!!!!

Can you be ecstatic and terrified all at the same time?

It’s hard to even communicate what I’m feeling, a huge mix of excitement, wonder, curiosity, nerves, sadness, trepidation, worry, stress and giddiness all at once.

In less than one month, I’ll be there. Whether I have an apartment by that point or not is unknown as is basically everything about this new life to come except my job which seems like it’ll be pretty much the same to start out – which is a very good thing.

Very bad thing: my office is right off of Times Square. TOURISTS!! EEK!!!

Honestly, I think the best way to sum up how I feel about this right now is…HOLY SHIT!πŸ™‚

Lovely

I’m supposed to be on my way to a Mike & Mike in the Morning book signing right now in downtown Boston, an event I took a vacation day from work for, and instead I’m at home sweating bullets, unable to eat anything and feeling like crap. Yeah, cause that’s fair.😦

People I canceled dinner on last night, definitely wasn’t lying to you. I think I’m 30 minutes away from saying I’m officially not well. Hope you all had fun, PF Chang’s sure did sound yummy.

“Sun in the sky, you know how I feel.

Breeze drifting on by, you know how I feel.

It’s a new dawn, it’s a new day, it’s a new life for me…and I’m feeling good.”